Army Comedy

Boredom is comedy’s best friend and in the army there is plenty of boredom to go around.

                Every platoon in the Army has its fair share of jokers making the slow days pass faster and more fun than even some of the best days doing cool stuff. There is always a catch phrase that lasts until a new catch phrase is established. Often times I find myself laughing to tears at the most asinine of jokes but it’s these types of outright debauchery and vulgarity that make the infantry better and more enjoyable than any other job in the world.

                Porn is a great ground base for all infantry humor. One could never go wrong with a good dick and ball joke, or showing your balls. However showing your balls at an inopportune time could lead to bad humor, example you don’t want to be caught with your balls hanging out and your underwear in the crack of you ass when the Chaplin walks into the barracks.

                Mom jokes are a staple in infantry humor, or ending everything with “that’s what she said”. One of my favorites is when a soldier goes on talking about some girl that he is giving sausage rides to, all the while baiting someone into asking “who”? Only to respond with “your mom” yes I love that it’s never not funny.

                Then there is the spoof funny. In every platoon there is a guy that can imitate any commander, 1SGT, Platoon Sergeant, or celebrity voice and make them do something funny. Example in the voice of the First Sergeant saying “men today we will all put our fingers in our asses then sniff them, after that I want the uniform of the day to be underwear, dress shoes, and gas mask”

                A picture says a thousand words, like a picture of you asleep and someone is shaving your eyebrows, or someone has there penis like an inch away from your face. I like the classic drawing mustaches and dicks on the face with a sharpie but that’s just me.

                Farts are funny, I don’t care who you are or where your at if someone farts your gonna laugh, then your gonna try to out fart them.

                Let’s keep it real, the army isn’t great everyday and sometimes it may suck but, if you got a group of guys to have fun with then it sucks good.

Comments

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